Does Your Spouse Irritate You?

Rob and I have been together for a long time. We have ten hundred children together. We own a house together. We have debt together. We have responsibilities together. And we’re a team. He can’t do his job without me and I can’t do my job without him.

So it’s a good thing we are happily married because we’re stuck together anyway.

However just because we’re happily married doesn’t mean we don’t irritate the crap out of each other. We squabble over little things and sometimes it’s easy to let the little things completely wind you up.

For example his absence of dishwasher stacking skills. I keep trying to teach him that you don’t have to cram everything we own into it like a game of tetris, but I’m not going to go into that now because I’m trying to keep my blood pressure down.

It drives him insane that I always have some windows open in winter when the heating is on. I hate stinky air. He hates the cold.

I hate the way he leaves his hankies in his pockets when he puts his jeans in the wash. Actually I hate his hankies fullstop.

I find it extruciatingly irritating that rather than take the bin out he’ll squish the rubbish down to make more room which makes it impossible to get out without breaking the bag.

He hates my penchant for shoe shopping and that I throw the bread crusts out.

… and he can’t stand it when I leave empty diet coke cans in the car.

The list goes on and on. They are only little things but when you live with someone for many many years and they do these things many many times it REALLY REALLY SHITS YOU. Welcome to marriage.

He and I are both guilty of it.

The other day I was on the sofa changing Jude’s nappy and I asked Rob to get me one from the cupboard quickly as Jude was screaming his head off and flapping about like a fish out of water. So he walked over to where the nappies are and picked up Jude’s bottle instead and brought it back for Jude to drink, then he walked back to get a packet of wipes and then brought them to me and then he walked back again to the same spot to get the nappy …

I watched him doing it and could feel my neck getting itchy with irritation and I know I shouldn’t have said anything but my inner juvenile is very strong-willed so I said “You know you could have done all those three things in one trip, rather than bringing me them individually. It was just torturous watching you, why would you do that? I just don’t get it?”

He looked at me with that ‘you are such a cow’ look and then his inner juvie piped up too and he said “Whatever, Steph, I don’t have to do things the way you do them because your way isn’t always the right way”.

Which is actually bullshit. Of course my way is the right way.

Everything peachy in your marriage or long-term relationship?